First, let us look at some of the laughable situations created in alien abduction. A real puzzle began when an east coast USA female abductee was returned wearing a man's tee shirt instead of her nightgown. The logo on the shirt was, "13th. Tsukuba Marathon." I finally traced the source of the name to a Japanese outer space complex, but why was the tee shirt on an east coast USA woman?

According to our covert Federal controllers abduction is not even happening, but the aliens are so busy at it they regularly goof up on abductees' clothing. Probably sometimes due to the less than smart at times, Gray type aliens. My abductees have returned with clothing inside out or backward or owned by someone else. A Virginia case has four shirts he never owned.

In case #92 Jacqueline, a Sage Apache in Idaho, was quite furious when she was returned in some other woman's panties. Some bewildered persons have found themselves outside naked in the yard. A family of five all found themselves all in different beds on the night neighbors saw bright lights and found a burned circle in the yard.

One husband kept replacing his wife's nightgowns in the hope that she wouldn't be seen floating naked over the neighborhood. One woman wore her Victoria's Secret nightgown to bed and returned in a man's oversized shirt. What man awakened in the Victoria's Secret nightgown and what did he tell his wife?

In case #4, Fox an Illinois farmer, moved to a new house on the property and some tenants moved into his old house. The next morning they were hurriedly moving out having had the wits scared out of them. Some very strange big headed ghosts with large eyes had peered at them in their rooms. Apparently the imperfect aliens had temporarily lost track of the farmer that they were abducting.

In case #58 Curtis from Michigan and his abductors again proved they were not perfect. The aliens had light beam power problems and they had a frightened flailing human on their hands. They couldn't get through the roof until the beam powered up. Once in bed Curtis watched a Gray bump its head on the ceiling unable to get through until the beam again powered up.

In case #1 Brandenburg, Indiana the joke was on the frightened abductee. When two tall Grays approached him in the craft holding out their arms toward him he decided he better give them something. He handed over a $20 bill from his pocket. Both examined it and that was the last he ever saw of it. He didn't have long to worry for one alien grabbed his arm and moved a pen-like device above the arm bend. I viewed the three long purple marks under his skin. In the yard were two 12 inch circular browned grass places each side of the spot he was zapped into the UFO from.

In case #34 Wingate, Kentucky a woman was mad, pregnant and not under control when three Grays in a row approached her across the bedroom floor. She leaped up and grabbed the middle Gray by its thin neck. She squeezed and its head fell back on its back. A slight startled look appeared on the faces of its two companions. Supporting the injured one they backed up robot style into the light beam in the bathroom and vanished. The abductee went back to bed full of remorse hoping she had not killed the being. David Jacobs Ph.D. also had a case in which the abductee kicked back causing the same effect in a Gray.

In case #105, New Jersey, Peggy possessed phenomenal ability to disturb all manner of electrical/radio equipment. Once when she walked by a row of slot machines in Atlantic City she set them all off. Jackpots clanged, happy players screamed, and casino employees stood aghast.

In case #3 White Song, Indiana, Zanna this abductee's Gray mentor, and others would fly White Song and her sister out of their upstairs farmhouse bedroom and up to the UFO. One night while enroute the troop of beings stopped and stretched their necks looking around as if checking something out. Later that morning as the little girls played on the floor in front of their parents they tried to stretch their necks like their aerial friends had. The parents, of course, thought their children were trying to act out another of their wild dreams.

Just about the funniest alien goof up was when a woman near Jefferson City, Missouri. had her escorting aliens abandon her and rush back to their craft. The UFO had landed and the weakened earth gave way under it. It had landed on a Missouri sink hole and sank out of sight. Scientists from near by Rolla, Missouri investigated this 20 foot diameter, 30 foot deep hole.

Although the UFO scene is deadly serious, one can see a little pathetic humor occasionally. The aliens will use space to tell you in detail about one alien "trick " then move on to things that are worse and show the intruders' awesome ability to do as they wish.

Mrs. Reed was driving on US-97 southeast of Crater Lake in Oregon. A she and the others climbed toward the summit, they noticed they were getting low on gas, so they began to look for a service station. Around a bend they came upon a big round building that was all lit up. As the car motor sputtered, then stopped, they coasted into a brightly lit, covered parking area containing several autos.

They entered a circular enclosure that was so brightly illuminated the walls seemed like mirrors. The group sat at a strange-looking table. The big round room had many windows around it two feet from the ceiling. The waiters and waitresses all were blond, and looked alike. They were about four and one half feet tall, slender, and wore silver uniforms and boots. They had soft musical voices.

One of the witnesses later remembered saying that the place was "really unbelievable." They believed they ordered, ate, and paid for a meal . As they left, their car coasted out of the place and was going around a bend before the motor started. They were still worried about the gas until they discovered the gauge showed half-a-tank full.

Later they arrived at State Road 138 and stopped to ask one of the highway employees working there with snowplows about the new restaurant up the road. The man looked at them as if they were "nuts " or something. He said there was no restaurant up the road and directed them to Chenult, 10 miles distant, where they bought gas.

It was here that Mrs. Reed's stepdaughter discovered she had left her purse in the restaurant. So they drove back to the area where they thought the restaurant had to be located. Their search proved fruitless. At Chenault, they stopped to eat and no one there knew of a round restaurant and they got the same strange looks.

Mrs. Reed also discovered she had the same amount of money she had before they stopped at the mysterious restaurant. It is apparent the group's abduction started before the false gas gauge reading and ended after they departed the so called restaurant.

Let us move on to things of a more serious nature. On a farm near Floyd's Knob in southern Indiana, a brother and sister I'll call Ted and Susan, later begin to have recall of a prior event. Susan remembers the orange ball outside and the beautiful blue, purple and violet lights in her room.

The little Gray beings and the tall blonde-haired human-like being in resplendent robe who seemed to be in charge.